Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

"I am not beautiful." That is the biggest lie I have ever heard anyone say.

I have grown to overcome the first sentence in this discussion. We all create these unnecessary standards of what is defined as beautiful. You are only competing with yourself, over the idea that you believe your appearance defines who you are. And that others can create an expectation of your love by a single glance. Beauty does not control the individual within, and who you are to the world. You do not need to become different for people in approval of their acceptance. You are who you want to be in acceptance of loving yourself because it is not at all selfish to put yourself first.

A Look in the Mirror

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. you need to accept yourself.” Thich Nhat Hanh

I am not beautiful. I look in the mirror and I am not happy with what I see. When there are constant beauty standards that feel like a requirement in our society now. With women and men we aspire to look like them because they are the definition of perfect. Or at least that's what our generation has made them out to be. Millions of girls my age want to be tan, skinny, perfect teeth, and have the body of a Goddess. Boys wanting to have a chiseled jawline, be pure muscle and be anything but weak. Measuring our self worth by a number on a scale. In comparison to everyone else around us. Because everything is a competition in being perfect. From the clothes we wear to the food we eat, less is better. Thank God to beauty standards we will continue to count our flaws. With beauty standards causing a rise in our youth, we are diagnosed with depression, anorexia, bdd, bulimia nervosa, as well as a series of other eating and mental disorders. Each country has created their own ideal list of aesthetics to be able to categorize people as perfect. In America we view others that have a tan complexion as a glowing body full of nothing but beauty. We will choose to strip ourselves and paint over our natural beauty so we can fit into the laws of appeal and contour what society wants. It has a massive impact on our mental well being and health, that we have all experienced a struggle with at one point in our lives. It does not matter if you are a man or a woman, because this society, as well as many other generations, has constructed a philosophy of beauty for individuals to feel insecure about themselves. People from all over the world have their own techniques to bring attention to what the ideal definition of perfection is. Whether it's the cosmetic industry lathering layers of makeup to models or the media convincing us that only real men don’t cry. Because at the end of the day we are only ourselves. A naked face, with frizzy hair, and feet that probably stink from working all day only to afford products to seemingly boost our self esteem. We are no longer viewed as unique, talented individuals, with a heart full of beauty and kindness for the world. As a part of this era we are currently living in, we should be deemed with the goodwill to crush beauty standards and the principles of aesthetics. To truly learn and understand how they affect our world today we will first step onto the scale to read the status quo of beauty standards around the world. Then we will look into the mirror to see how they affect ourselves as well as our mental health. And finally we will pick up our Vogue Magazines to see who the real models of this time are.

Beauty Around the World

First allow us to spin the globe and see how cultures around our world respond to beauty standards. Our concern with beauty is the internal obsession we all battle our mind with but it could not be more different how we perceive beauty across all nations. In South Korea, the desire for a porcelain, cream complexion is famous. Pale skin has been set as a standard as a sign of wealth, status, and innocence for both men and women. Not only this but they are infamously recognized for having an excessive focus on plastic surgery and physical aesthetics. While it may be necessary for skin-care to contribute towards an individual’s beauty, We might realize that obsessing about it is more dangerous than beneficial. The idolization of specific aspects of our facial structure and body can often encourage men and women to feel insecure of their natural appearance. In India beauty standards are becoming more excessive than ever. Their image expectations have turned to cultural norms. Already placing more amounts of stress on males and females to enhance their skin tone, in an attempt to maintain power of beauty. With this, skin bleaching is very popular, in fact there are a vast amount of industries that create these artificial serums. People in India are unfair to one another on the sole premise of skin color. Society has constructed there to be an appropriate degree of how dark and light you may be, as well as in other countries. Those that have a lighter complexion are understood to symbolize higher power and privilege because they are not working all day in the sun to earn wages. If healthy eating and fitness don't improve your physical appearance , several women are mentally prepared to go below the blade for implants. All to meet impossible standards that will cause them nothing but pain in the process. When in reality people are more attracted to those that are confident with who they are inside out. Men and women would prefer to bleach their skin in far too many societies around the globe, cultivate unhealthy dietary patterns, workout unnecessarily, and cut through their bodies to recreate themselves as a culmination of the aesthetics of attraction and it can be incredibly detrimental to one's self-confidence and mental well-being.

Beauty Hurts

“Take a long look in the mirror, and tell yourself you love you.”

We must wipe off our makeup and step off the treadmill to understand how beauty standards truly affect our mental health in both men and women. What we truly think of ourselves is what builds our self esteem. It can improve or destroy it. The concept of our body image includes the ideas and emotions about one's appearance, ranging from what it feels to function in the body, our structure expectations, and beauty ideals. Social media and modeling agencies create the pressure of requirements for men to have rock hard abs, to be tall, and is characterized by having facial symmetry with more masculine features. The visionary for women is to have an hourglass shape, flawless skin, full lips and a perfectly upturned nose. Our way of thinking about how we look has always had a serious influence on our self worth. The most valuable concept to realize is that self-esteem and the perception of our body is not in what we see in our reflection, but how we feel in our minds. It is up to us to change our sense of inner strength and the interpretation of our body's form and weight, because they do not decide our worth and that we matter more to the world than only our body's beauty. It is harming our mental health and resulting in individuals being able to look in the mirror and say :"I hate myself, I hate myself, I hate everything about myself. I am not good enough, I will never be good enough. I am not beautiful. I hate myself." The mental health foundation reported that social anxiety and depression increase the threat of harmful dietary habits and eating disorders are correlated with increased body dissatisfaction. The United States National Library of Medicine and National Institutes of Health conducted an article about how we are seeking to grasp this pattern of our continuing desire for expectations of perfection that we recognize to be unreal or perhaps impossible. To give psychological and analytical explanations for why this could be, we rely on our respective disciplines. We believe that the principles of beauty are profoundly rooted in our expectations, habits, and self-construction. A Bradley Hospital study showed that individuals that struggle with weight or body dysmorphic disorder have elevated scores of depression and are more inclined to suffer suicidal thoughts. There are beautiful human beings wanting to die because they don’t feel good enough for the ideal standards in our toxic societies.

You Are Beautiful

Finally we will walk down the runway to the American model Crystal Renn has drawn awareness to the fact that “the problems that we as a society simply accept these unrealistic standards; that you have to be thin to be perfect, to be beautiful, to be successful at work, and to have a good relationship. And it is making us sick. This self- loathing is crippling women.” Yet we continue to accept this? We spend so much of our lives criticizing ourselves for impossible standards just to meet someone else’s pleasure and to feel loved. So much time is spent wishing how we could look like someone else, and questioning our self worth. We sometimes forget that other people deal with the same struggles we have. Some of us just have to accept it. While others spend their whole life trying to become their ideal definition of perfection so we can feel welcomed into society’s toxic standards of aesthetics. We must stop. We must stop trying to identify our imperfections and flaws. And replace them with love for ourselves and others. Those who are truly beautiful spread kindness to everyone, any chance they can get. And inspire individuals to welcome themselves into their version of happiness. Not social media, or and especially not the high school hierarchy. The only people in this world you could even remotely call ugly, are those who would rather choose to hurt people and make them question if they are even enough. We have the power to decide the effect of modeling outlets and any network that tries to define our self worth. To crush beauty standards we as a society must encourage positivity, to be our best and true selves. Your body is your safe place, your home. Treat it kindly. Care for yourself and others and never discourage someone because they look different from society’s norms. Because this is normal. Stretch marks are normal, acne is normal. Being tall, short, skinny, or big is normal, And it is beautiful. Aside from your shining eyes, a smile that could light up the whole room and the body of a warrior, who is on the inside is what is truly beautiful about you. I am beautiful. You are beautiful.